Arm in Arm

For seventeen years I was a chaplain with Canadian veterans who were among those who had liberated our town in Friesland. I felt privileged to serve them. Recently I attended the funeral service of a prominent Christian Reformed woman whose story ranks among these honored veterans.

Born in 1918 in Amsterdam, this woman married a Gereformeerde dominee in 1942 whose first charge was in Friesland. Together this pastor and his wife hid Jews and underground resistance fighters in their home, risking their own safety to protect others. She stored weapons for the underground movement because “even the Germans would not suspect a pastor of having weapons!” Her courage in the face of tremendous forces of evil made her, in my mind, a veteran and a hero of faith.

But resisting the Nazis was not the only cause she served. She was also a veteran in the struggle for gender equality. She had wanted to become a nurse, but, being engaged, this career was not an option for her. Instead she enrolled in the theology department of the Free University, one of the first women to do so. With five children, the family immigrated to Canada in 1955, where their sixth was born.

As a minister’s wife she worked discreetly and tirelessly for gender equality in the CRC. Thank God she lived long enough to see her denomination take the word “male” out of the requirements for officebearers.

At her funeral, her daughter spoke of her mother’s deep love and courage at a time when the daughter had come out as a lesbian and some of her church family had treated her unkindly. Her mother came to visit her, and while they were walking down the street, they saw a couple approaching. She said, “Mom, that’s the couple that treated me rudely!” In response, her mother linked her arm with her daughter’s and walked proudly past the couple. This loving, courageous woman stood with her daughter against those who would diminish her and affirmed her worth.

The image of this mother and daughter walking with linked arms is one that inspires me to believe that my church will one day have the courage to fully affirm all her children.